Mostly Adequate!
In this day of anonymous internet commenting, aggressive driving, and movie theater phone calls, it's hard to be aware of just how many people you've annoyed and now want you dead. Here is a quick questionnaire that will definitively tell you if the Mexican drug cartels are out for your blood. We're a pretty low-tech …
Continue reading "Are the Mexican Drug Cartels Coming for You: A Questionnaire"
If you are anything like anyone else who has access to food and water without having to battle a desert crime lord, then at some point you have bought something you didn’t need. Don’t deny it; I can’t hear you and anyone who can doesn’t care. You’ve wasted money before, but you can redeem yourself …
Continue reading "5 Reasons You Should Invest in a Gargoyle"
I know you and I were friends once, and for some time I’ve been avoiding you. Here are the reasons why. 1. The Sexual Tension Let’s not kid ourselves. You’ve seen me across the room, and I’ve obviously studied your sweet rockin’ bod while you were giving the glance to that oil painting of the …
Continue reading "Between 3 and 5 Reasons Why You (Yes You) and I Can’t Be Friends"
For the first post of this new, reinvigorated Non-Euclidean sofa, I’d like to introduce myself. However, wanting to do something and actually doing it are completely different things. I’d like to introduce myself, but I’m not going to do that. The internet--where I live with neighbors like you--is terrifying to me, and I’d rather not …
