By now, I’m pretty used to the feelings that come with ending a semester. It’s sad to see people I’ve just started getting to know leave, and it’s a strange kind of devastating to recognize that just as I start getting comfortable with a group, they leave. Imagine moving into a new apartment and having …
Looking for Income in New Places
As I struggle to reconcile my uncertain future with the image I’ve had of myself since childhood--part street magician and part elven royalty--I think it may be necessary to seek a more certain form of gainful employment. Teaching is great, and of course I expect a steady and substantial income to come from it, but …
I Can’t Stop Embarrassing Myself in Front of my Students
I’ve never told anyone this, but if Barack Obama and I hug, the resulting explosion could destroy the entire Western hemisphere. When that much cool directly encounters my near limitless anti-cool, the results can be catastrophic. If I even spend too much time letting my eyes ski down those magnificent cheekbones, there’s risk of a …
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To the People Who Make Phone Calls in the Library
I remember being young and full of zest and zeal, being so relentlessly alive that I couldn’t help but leave some noise in my wake. I remember running in the grocery store, loudly whining if my parents tricked me into going to church, playing Snake on my mom’s phone at the movies, yelling at the …
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Loud People Visiting Schools and a Brief Discussion of Birds
The three-wattled bellbird has a call audible to humans up to half a mile away; it lives primarily in Central America, and from the base of its beak protrude three long worm-like tendrils. Most, if given the choice, do not surround themselves with three-wattled bellbirds in part because they are very secretive, and in part, …
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