2016 is over as of a few hours ago, and it was a doozy of a year. A bunch of people died, some other stuff happened, we elected a failed businessman to be President of the United States, and some other terrible stuff probably happened. It was a rough year, but 2017 doesn’t have …
Clean Your Kitchen Before it is Too Late
This post is brought to you by hypocrisy. I have seen the crawling chaos of a kitchen kept in a permanent hurricane of filth. I have seen dishes smeared with a residue of coalesced grime with a slithering, unreal consistency. I have seen what grows in a sealed crock pot six months after the …
Surviving in a Room With a Cat
You’re in a small room with bare walls and a concrete floor. You don’t know how you got there, but that doesn’t matter because in front of you, contorted and licking itself, is a cat. What do you do? You don’t know. You’re completely in over your head, but how could you have prepared for …
Things You Shouldn’t Do While Cooking
Cooking is hard, or it’s not. It’s also dangerous, or it isn’t. Really, depending on how competent you are in the kitchen, cooking can be a life-threatening, nearly impossible task, or it can be as soothing as drifting down a lazy river of pancake batter whilst serenaded by James Earl Jones. In my culinary ventures …
How to Live Between Seasons of Game of Thrones
So you’re experiencing the post season finale malaise now that Game of Thrones has concluded for another year. Maybe you’re spending your time re-watching the last 10 blood-and-sex-filled hours of the series, or maybe you’re endeavoring to re-watch everything. It doesn’t matter what you’re doing because you are refusing to accept that it’s over, …
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Non-Euclidean Sofa 